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What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
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Sillykitty
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What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-06-2010 10:56 PM

Wierd question, I know.

But my stepmother is under hospice care (stage 4 cancer) and the visiting hospice nurse just told me today that she will probably go today or tomorrow.

So I am leaving work to go and wait with my good friend, who is being kind enough to caretake her til the end, for no compensation whatsoever.

My friend has gotten very attached to my stepmother, and I think she may be in denial that the end really is here (I am told that the hospice nurses are pretty much right on the money about when someone is about to go).

I have:

Beguiled, SSK, Damsel, Down, Girl (maybe Down Gir?)
Most AD products, or at least a huge selection
A good selection of LP phero blend products, including Happy Water, Elevation Potion, etc. Also EST from there (wow it feels wierd to actually say things out loud, kinda nice actually!)
Love Scent androstadienone, Scent of Eros for women. Essence of Woman (which is probably not appropriate)

I have a feeling my friend might really lose it Sad

Anyone ever been in this situation? I haven't.

Hopefully it won't be a huge scene, she is DNR (do not resuscitate), so no 911, ambulances or any of that fun stuff.............just a phone call to hospice, they do the rest...........

I really really cannot stand big boo-hoo scenes................

01-06-2010 10:56 PM
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esmeralda
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-06-2010 11:35 PM

Hey Sillykitty,

I'm so sorry to hear what you and your friend is going through, it is hard... My bestfriend went through breastcancer and I freaked out... and in my honest opinion Pheromones really don't help a lot...

you can try something like p96 (if it's available...) but really, be around her and listen to what she has to say. Talking makes eases things up a bit, don't let her bottle up her emotions...

I really hope she'll be okay Smile Good luck love xx
01-06-2010 11:35 PM
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mark-in-dallas
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-06-2010 11:41 PM

While I can't really help you with your phero question, I want to let you know that you have my deepest condolences, and a friend who sounds like she wants to be there for both you and your step-mother and a pretty awesome friend!

If there is anything that we can do, I think I can safely say that we're all here for you and all you have to do is ask.


Nobody changes until the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of change....
01-06-2010 11:41 PM
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Sillykitty
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-06-2010 11:57 PM

Thanks so much for your kind thoughts and words, she will be okay when she is free of pain and can leave her poor body behind......
01-06-2010 11:57 PM
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Bella
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-06-2010 11:58 PM

I'm sorry to hear about your stepmom, SK. I don't think there are any pheromones that can really steer such over riding emotional feelings. It's like walking into a noisy room whispering and expecting people to hear you across the room. They can't hear you. With too many distractions the signal doesn't always compute. Being there as loving and supportive as you can be is the best comfort you can offer.

If you feel as though you can't get through the ordeal w/o them, then my suggestion is to wear what makes you feel better. I can't say that it won't also help/effect your dear friend/others around you but at least you may be able to alleviate a bit of stress for yourself. For calming/comfort, I'd use some Androstadienone.

I'll say a prayer for all of you.


Bella

01-06-2010 11:58 PM
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Diane999
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-07-2010 3:52 AM

It isn't always a good idea to take someone's grief away, especially when it is fresh. Grief is the beginning of a natural cleansing process, that leads to closure and peace.

I know someone else's grief can cause anxiety, so a shot of Down, Girl! for yourself so you can be there for your friend if she loses it might not be a bad idea. But I suggest spraying it on a piece of paper that you can huff before you go in and discard might be the best.

I'm so sorry your step mom is dying. And I'm sorry your friend is taking it hard. You have my best regards, and I'll add you all to my prayers tonight.

Diane
01-07-2010 3:52 AM
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Tisha
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-07-2010 5:18 AM

(((((Sillykitty))))))

I am so sorry about your step mom. Believe me when I tell you that pheromones wont help. Grief is a strong emotion and having just been through this I know it wont help. I still used pheromones as I went through my grief with my Dad and none of them made a difference either way on anyone exposed to them or myself. I even tried my Instant Female Magic which never did much for me, I thought well maybe I will finally get to see something with it but I think as Bella mentioned there are just to many emotions going through everyone involved and the signal is just a whisper that cant be heard.

I am sending my positive energy and good thoughts you way.

Tisha
01-07-2010 5:18 AM
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renny
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-07-2010 8:41 AM

Hey SK, sounds like a tough time and I want to express my sadness that you have to go through this. All I can tell you pheromone wise is trust your own instincts. Nothing is going to take away that kind of grief but I think that sometimes during stressful times pheromones can be a talisman if nothing else. Remind your friend of how grateful you are to have her during this time. Take care and know that we are here to listen.

The Androstenone Discussion
01-07-2010 8:41 AM
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Gone with the Wind
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-07-2010 8:52 AM

What a great question.

It is a reminder for us all that pheromones are like clothes or a car. They may add a flavor to certain events, but our lives are what we make of them with our actions.

Wishing you the best, SK, in trying times.

Gone with the Wind

<p align="center">Gate, gate, paragate, parasamgate. Bodhi svaha!</p>
01-07-2010 8:52 AM
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Willow
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RE: What is a good "deathbed" (and after) mix?
01-07-2010 6:15 PM

Oh SillyKitty, my heartfelt condolences to you and your friend and your family. I hope that your stepmother's release from her suffering can be some comfort. All I can say is that grief is a process. We have to go through it. I lost my brother this fall, and I still have my moments of stunned emptiness. My thoughts are with you as you start down the path.

01-07-2010 6:15 PM
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